The Frontier of the Frozen Section Part 1

“The cure to information overload is more information” -David Weinberger

Frozen pizza is truly a gift to the pizza enthusiast—considerably one of modern man’s greatest culinary reimaginations (a rung right below the creation of pizza itself). 

Thanks to the frozen pizza we can have pizza whenever we want; any time of day, without leaving the house.  A perfect pairing for lazy days, late nights, entertaining friends or as a quick dinner with the family.

We simply have to wait for the glow of the little red preheat light to give us the go-ahead and in 12-15 minutes we’ve got piping hot pizza.

Beyond convenience, the frozen puts us in control—we don’t have to worry about the inconsistencies (or interactions) of a restaurant.  We can cook it well-done or almost doughy, cut it in any shapes we want and put our spice racks to use—seasoning it to perfection.

We are fortunate to live a time of such luxury.  There’s only one problem…

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The frozen section dilemma.

The real challenge these days becomes picking out the right pizza.  Sifting through the ever-growing selection of the frozen pizza aisle to find the brand that suits our preference best is not as easy as it used to be.  Tombstone alone has close to 20 different variations to choose from.

For some, the choice is a no brainer, it’s the warmth of tradition—classics like Jack’s or Red Baron or whatever you grew up with—for others, it could be the influence of mouthwatering TV advertising from the likes of a brand like DiGiorno.

What fascinates me most are the eccentric regional up and comers like Brewpub “Lottza Mottza”, Palermo’s “Screamin’ Sicilian”, “Connie’s” and “Urban Pie”, and my favorite from right in my backyard O’Grady’s.  I’ve found many of these young pizza brands are pushing the boundaries of frozen pizza quality, so I’m setting out find the best of the best among them.

Recently I came across one of those startups with a mission to craft pizzas that reflect the overlooked styles of middle America.  With three words, I was sold.

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Milwaukee Style Pizza.

Outsiders Pizza Co. is a brand that is popping up all over the pizza aisle. It appears they’re out to capture heart and soul of midwestern pizzeria’s into frozen form; they’ve currently got a Milwaukee Tavern Style and a Detroit Style.

They explain on their website “Outsiders Pizza was born to celebrate these under-respected regional styles. Because damn good pizza can come from anywhere.”

Though they are backed by a Nestle incubator in Ohio, the idea that they are trying to showcase “lesser-known regional styles from places that reminded us of our hometowns” is wildly refreshing to me.

So, being the proud Wisconsin boy who’s excited to celebrate just about anything that rises to fame out of the midwest, I was thrilled to explore a Milwaukee Tavern Style option equipped with cheese curds and everything.

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That’s right, cheese curds.

Cheese is the key to any Wisconsinites heart, so I had to start with the “Spicy Sausage and Cheese Curds” Milwaukee Tavern Style option.

Once I sunk my teeth into a pool of melted curd, it was obvious that the coveted Wisconsin delicacy’s time to shine on a pizza was long overdue.  After all, it’s a sure-fire way to take a frozen pizza up a notch into extra cheesy greatness—a level that can hardly be reached by brittle white shreds.

The curds are nestled between peppers, onions, and spicy sausage chunks that lay on a woven bed of thick cut mozzarella rectangles about the width of a stick of Orbit gum.  All of the ingredients are brought together by a spicy red sauce and to create a true tavern style experience the instructions recommend a square cut (how cool is that).

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The future of frozen’s.

Outsiders Pizza Co. is one of the many brands that get me excited about the future of the frozen pizza aisle.  They’ve got a great mission and a righteous pizza.

Outsiders also helped me realize that having a plethora of options isn’t always a bad thing—we can use our accumulated knowledge to find a choice that fits us best.  I believe pizzeria caliber frozen pizza is still out there and my search will continue with the hope that one day we’ll have a product that is almost indistinguishable from the real thing.

What pizza taught me:

We live in an age of unlimited choices and that can make choosing awfully challenging. There is a bright side though: There’s a higher chance we can connect with our perfect niche or find our perfect pizza.  With cheese curds on frozen pizzas, the world seems like a better place to me.

What I’m eating:  Outsider Pizza Co.: Milwaukee Tavern Style: Spicy Sausage and Cheese Curds

What I’m reading:  Wooden on Leadership: How to Create a Winning Organization –John Wooden

Photo cred: Adam Kuban

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The Perfect Bite

“The five senses are the ministers of the soul” -Leonardo Di Vinci

The first bite of a slice is a fantastic experience for all five senses. 

From the moment you open that warm box and get a waft of garlic, basil, buttery cheese, and cardboard, it’s undeniable your sense of smell, sight, sound, touch, and taste are in for an epic treat.

It all begins, as your eyes flicker back and forth making an initial scan for the best slice—searching for the piece where the toppings fall in the just the right places—the perfect pepperoni count—maybe even one with those pepperoni slivers that get lodged in the extra cheese that spills into the canyons created by the pizza cutter.

Next, you gingerly pick up your chosen slice.  You pinch a dry corner of flour-dusted crust—you can feel the heat emitting from the molten cheese and grease that sieges it.

You let out a gentle, whispered blow, your mouth slightly whistling as your breath sends steam rolling off of it—simultaneously cooling it down and speeding up eating time.

Finally, the best part, your sensory pleasure cruise crescendos as you open up wide and your teeth and gums plunge into melty cheese—unleashing grease that graces the roof of your mouth.  The sauce and toppings mix as your lips close around them—all of the elements merging together into a harmonious collision.  The lapping of your tongue fusing together the flavors into a compacted ball of pizza mush with each gyration of your jaw.

There’s nothing quite like that first bite and usually, it’s gone before I think twice.

Recently I witnessed my 1-year-old son frantically scarfing down his dinner as fast as humanly possible.  Prior to that, for about half an hour, he had whined for it, moaned and groaned for it and then as soon as he had it, down it went in the blink of an eye.

“Slow down and enjoy it, buddy” I commented.

Then, I paused and pondered those words for a second: slow down and enjoy it?  

I thought about when I get that pizza box in front of me and my taste buds are about to be stormed with a deluge of salty goodness, I quite often go HAM and just devour it all as well.

Maybe I’m the one who needs to slow down?

Shouldn’t I savor my favorite moments?

Perhaps I could reach new levels of pizza eating enjoyment if I just paid more attention?

Taking that first bite to another level. 

Best-selling author and reformed stock market manipulator Jordan Belfort (portrayed by Leonardo Dicaprio in the film The Wolf of Wall Street (no worries, he says he only uses his powers for good now)) takes that idea one step further in his recent book on persuasion Way of the Wolf.

In the book, he describes a process called “neuro-linguistic programming” in which he explains we can achieve a primed state on demand by honing in on our senses while in a moment of success.  The theory says that we can condition ourselves using sensory experiences to create behavioral patterns.

In essence, it works by connecting powerful emotions to memories, similar to the way we get the warm and fuzzies when we smell fresh cut grass in the summer, cookies around Christmas or pizza straight from the oven.  When we experience those sensations we get transported right back to the time we enjoyed them.

So, the idea behind Belfort’s concept is to manufacture that effect by concentrating on the most intricate details of the sights, sounds, smells, tastes, and feelings when we are in “the zone”.  By doing that we can create a connection or an “anchor” to that moment.  We can then call upon that “anchor” by using whatever sensation we connected it to and in doing so trigger our A-game when we need it.

So, looks like I’m carrying around pizza seasoning in my pocket from now on.

What pizza taught me:

I don’t know if romanticizing pizza will help me reach my ideal state, but slowing down and cherishing that first bite made me realize how close to perfection pizza already is.

What I’m eating: Marco’s Pizza: hand-tossed old world pepperoni pizza

What I’m reading:  Jordan Belfort Way of the Wolf: Straight Line Selling: Master the Art of Persuasion, Influence, and Success

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